England’s Mat Turner Tuesday: Guildford, Tindall, Senna & Upcoming HSBC 7s

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Every Tuesday, England 7s star Mathew Drew Turner takes on the role of brazen, if not cheeky, reporter for RWU. Today he’s spot on!
As I said last week, if all goes to plan this will the last article I write in the northern hemisphere till the new year. So… drum roll.. Yes! All did go to plan and I, along with the rest of the England Sevens Squad, will be climbing on a plane firstly to Sydney for a few days of acclimatising and “sun,” then up to Brisbane for the first leg of the HSBC Sevens Series.

Go, Zac!

Now, I’m sure everyone has heard the whole story about Mike Tindall, and its probably in my personal interests and safety not to mention anything about it, so I’m not going to say anything… Except this: “Top Lad!

Besides, Zac Guildford has had a Frank The Tank episode! He has gone streaking threw the quad into the gymnasium (bar)! We’ve all done it before, nothing like letting it all hang free… just ask Sam Edgerley, I’ve seen him naked more times than myself. So I’m naked whilst I type this… just to catch up.

Rodwell at home.

One of the things I’m looking forward to over these next 4 weeks, besides the Rugbywhich I just want to start now, is Nick Royle abroad. There is a rumour he has decided to leave his training kit in order to bring his complete metal-detecting kit. He has personally informed me that he will be scouring the beaches in every possible free second he has.

Also I can’t wait for the likes of John Brake, James Rodwell and Ben Ryan to be constantly applying sunscreen. I keep thinking to myself, ‘Thanks Mom and Dad for not missing that one chromosome.’

I’ve set two missions for myself whilst in Australia – outside of the rugby of course: 1) Find the best flat white in Sydney and 2) Get a Speedo tan! If your wondering where the Speedo moment came from, I recently watched Senna: The Movie, and Ayrton Senna wore a Speedo, so I came to the conclusion that in order to be the best at your sport, you have to sport the Speedo look. It’s basic science.


Finally, it’s going to be interesting to see if Dan Norton and James Rodwell bring their wallets with them this time, I’d call them “Scottish” but that would be an understatement! James will no doubt say “I’ve got a mortgage to pay!” And Norts? Well he’s just Norts. Here’s a story for you: We went out in Bristol one night, to go squeak some tackie, of course. We go to a place called Embargo’s, where we find ourselves paying entrance charge. Being The Dan Norton, he is having none of it and walks away. Being me, I go ask how much cover is. I quote the Bouncer here, “£3.” I then burst out laughing at Daniel, but he still refuses! So being this lovely caring soul, I take the plunge and pay a massive £6 for both of us to get in.

Next week, I’ll being interviewing one of the squad and giving you my lowdown on Australia. Until then put another shrimp on the baaarbi… Or is that Barberie, Johnathan?